THE ENIGMA OF GRAMMAR IN HEADLINES

Okay folks – with they busy holidays and still trying to settle in – there is not much time to write.  BUT – I did gather these headlines quite some time ago that are HILARIOUS and I have to share them with you.  If you have seen any headlines recently that gave you a pause or a laugh – put them in a comment back to me!  Enjoy these! (If you don’t get the headline – read it again!)

EYE DROPS OFF SHELF

SQUAD HELPS DOG BITE VICTIM

AMERICAN SHIPS HEAD TO LYBIA

DEALERS WILL HEAR CAR TALK AT NOON

ENRAGED COW INJURES FARMER WITH AXE

MINERS REFUSE TO WORK AFTER DEATH

TWO SOVIET SHIPS COLLIDE — ONE DIES

TWO SISTERS REUNITED AFTER EIGHTEEN YEARS AT CHECKOUT COUNTER

IS THIS WHAT WAS MEANT?    OR NOT?

NEVER WITHHOLD HERPES FROM LOVED ONE

NICARAGUA SETS GOAL TO WIPE OUT LITERACY

DRUNK DRIVERS PAID $1,000 IN 1984

AUTOS KILLING 110 A DAY

LET’S RESOLVE TO DO BETTER

 OBVIOUS EDITOR BOTCHES

IF STRIKE ISN’T SETTLED QUICKLY IT MAY LAST A WHILE

WAR DIMS HOPE FOR PEACE

SMOKERS ARE PRODUCTIVE, BUT DEATH CUTS EFFICIENCY

COLD WAVES LINKED TO TEMPERATURES

HALF OF U.S. HIGH SCHOOLS REQUIRE SOME STUDY FOR GRADUATION

CHILD’S DEATH RUINS COUPLE’S HOLIDAY

BLIND WOMAN GETS NEW KIDNEY FROM DAD SHE HASN’T SEEN IN YEARS

MAN IS FATALLY SLAIN

SOMETHING WENT WRONG IN JET CRASH

DEATH CAUSES LONELINESS, FEELINGS OF ISOLATION

UNINTENTIONALLY SUGGESTIVE

QUEEN MARY HAVING BOTTOM SCRAPED

IS THERE A RING OF DEBRIS AROUND URANUS

ANTIQUE STRIPPER TO DISPLAY WARES AT STORE

PROSTITUTES APPEAL TO POPE

PANDA MATING FAILS — VETERINARIAN TAKES OVER

NJ JUDGE TO RULE ON NUDE BEACH

CHILD’S STOOL GREAT FOR USE IN GARDEN

SOVIET VIRGIN LANDS SHORT OF GOAL AGAIN

 CAUSE OF AIDS FOUND — SCIENTISTS

ORGAN FESTIVAL ENDS IN SMASHING CLIMAX

AMBIGUOUS HEADLINES

DEAF MUTE GETS NEW HEARING IN KILLING

DEFENDANT’S SPEECH ENDS IN LONG SENTENCE

POLICE BEGIN CAMPAIGN TO RUN DOWN JAYWALKERS

STIFF OPPOSITION EXPECTED

TO CASKETLESS FUNERAL PLAN

MEN RECOMMEND MORE CLUBS FOR WIVES

TWO CONVICTS EVADE NOOSE JURY HUNG

MILK DRINKERS ARE TURNING TO POWDER

SAFETY EXPERTS SAY SCHOOL BUS

PASSENGERS SHOULD BE BELTED

QUARTER OF A MILLION CHINESE LIVE ON WATER

JUDGE ACTS TO REOPEN THEATER

FARMER BILL DIES IN HOUSE

IRAQI HEAD SEEKS ARMS

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About Caroline

Daughter, Sister, Mom... I think the best thing I've done is to be a mom, to give my kids my love but not my thoughts and to listen, observe, offer advice when needed.
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